The job was getting out of hand, so we settled
on a strategy. Clients like that word.
I'd get the search function working on the current
site, streamline the order processing so even an AOL customer
could use it, then mirror the whole shebang on a new server down
the coast. When the mirror was beta'd, we'd redirect the NIC at
6 a.m. when even the sys ads were sleeping. Or better yet, on
a Thursday afternoon at 4 p.m., when the sys ads were still being
harassed by ticked-off customers. With that timing, most North
American servers would be re-resolved to the new IP address by
I was worried a sys ad would notice the new file
dates. Fred offered to change the server's time clock while I
uploaded. Thanks, but no thanks. Hostage rescue is about saving
the hostages. Designers we take care of later, if you know what
I tiptoed in and tweaked the search functions
and order processing. You can pretty well figure that a designer
who puts the database field delimiters in the wrong place is not
coming back to check his work.
The gag-me-Elmo graphic design I left alone.
Hell hath no fury like a designer whose images have been deleted.
But the spelling mistakes had to go. Graphics boyos don't read
text, so it's always safe to correct the mistakes they put in
images. I poked through the back room and came up with a dusty
dictionary. You could hear my 8th grade English teacher Miss Peabody
cackling in her grave. Revenge is sweet, I guess.
That was about as far as I could take this rusty
bucket. With the search functions working orders were trickling
in. At least they'd be able to pay my bill....